losing n gaining

To sum up 2006, i lost n gain tings which i once had. people n memories which i had.but the fact is its never the same prior to the test of time, the certain beliefs that once clung to me has modified. e inital feeings that was once touched was never the same after a couple of years later. it has got an expiry date for that. & realization struck me.like few buckets of icy water splashed to me straight to my face.
it can never b the same.
losing has made me gained stronger kinship n bond with my family n closer group of buddies.no doubt they have provided me the care that i need during the past 3 months which i had gradually picked myself up frm when i fell. e brief period with that person taught me a few learning pt.some conversation with the consultants has provided the other side of me which needs to be further improved which i will work on strongly to consciously be aware to greatly affect my interpersonal skills with certain external parties ie colleagues , superior n the upcoming ones.letting go of some good memories is never a easy task, but i have faith that i can set my mind to accomplish it.it takes a lot to do that. n to me waking this path till now has never been smooth sailing, frm my innocent adolences to the present.having times of solitude is benefical to b able to sort those confused & mixed messages running in my mind to sieve through the negative emotions & slow emerging to the usual bubbly n chirpy self.
i might have lost someting but i belive i have gained more now.
it will be a more fruitful journey ahead even without some companionship but its ok . coz it needs more of the strength n courage to face it than to hide frm it.
2007 n the upcoming 2008 . as much as i could spice up my activities n do a complete make over but testing my own limit. overiding my personal limitations n enjoying life as it comes.
by taking small steps gradually , i strongly believe it my goals can be achieved ultimately n who knows it might b e best decison made to make up for my loss.
truth stings but it never lies.
cant help but be relieved
that the twist of events can b a blessing in disguise.
0222 250307

a tough day today

a nt so gd start wtih a few diffcult customers 1203
confrontation frm a fellow colleague vs a chao keng colleague, caught in between...well tat was on a mon

tue.. farewell dinner with linda the crew1303
last min claim off,, got a earful frm lee ... n pat.. hehehe
went out on a dinner with CK... friendly person but not my type



wed.. so far so gd1403

Reminiscences

those were the days where we worry about exam, waking up early for sch. studying for finals n working on ur final yr project. i c my niece n nephews looking at their cute school bags brings back to ur school days..

today's trip to causeway pt... gives me much reminiscences of the movie together...

going to the usual shops again is a different type of experience

some tings which r over ought to be , its been almost 3 months since we broke off. i still cant bring myself to forget everyting , e tings shared n done

its like a sore feeling which cant be erased easily n it puts a fear whenever i meet new ppl

i thought i can get over him.

but it takes slower than i tink i could

appointment with e sunlight adviser

hahahahha not another trip to visit the consultant for advice in my overall luck this pig yr..

dunno wats e e outcome after her cousulation

quiet day @ the br...

with e usual interesting characters..

another hr to ko. looking forward to a nice nap

a psychiatric visit with old bean on 23/3

just had lunch with old bean.
called me up .
after visiting the clinic for mc was refered to a medical specialist for his mental health issues
got some info to seek some professional help frm behavioral clinic to seek some form of appointment to find out his source of problem to treat his clinical problems
sleepwalking in the night , nt able to sleep well n occasionally some shocking acts just put an alram,
although its rather worrying..
dunno what is wrong with the issue.
maybe some doctor advice would be good to solve rotten worm's issue n his worries

frm sleeptalking.. gradually smashing the Tv in the rm, to sleep walking n taking a knife ard in the house is certainly rather detrimental..
affects e well being as well as my safety in the house. has to keep a watch or keep my room locked so i can sleep in peace.

got to get more information frm the web to get some facts right so as to to be prepared of the various kinds of treatment to apply .

except for that pt. i guess e family is still right on track,
with me gradually bucking up each day. challenging myself.. reminding myself that i have no more time to waste.. ace thru my upcoming exams.

worm issue can only be solved if he can solve his own problems so he can be no longer a burden to old bean.

no more time to waste..

shiken...

2 more months n it will b exam
feeling e heat man
...
veri soon i have to cross the hurdles n various obstacles to reach my goals n targets
tiring but fufiling lifestyle

tough units.
scared of failure. afraid that i will have to retake , n redo. n my efforts will b wasted
tats a veri dark thought.

after visiting ravee today. she did gave mesome pointers.
like building n improving more PR whic h will aid me in my relationship with people . ie colleagues
its really a challenge, maybe being too straightforward do put me in difficult position
wat brings me after next yr. upon grad is a big question mark like back to the line of cross roads.
lately i been tinking.. really making lots of $$$ n oso achieving the interest which i like to pursue.
is it really a wise decision to leave a comfort zone . n starting frm the scratch
should i go for the swizzerland intership or stay in the comfort n familar banking environement which i have grown so accustomed..
front line indeed is exciting n true enough never boring but can get tiring n mind draining
last nite @ st james was one nite tat i cant forget coz i c the ugly side of human
corroding away in the cells of the nite entertainment
life is never tat peaceful.. each to our own path to seek