muster all efforts to wake up @ 6 to revise

i m a weird bitch who refuse to sleep a lot..hahahah

rain big big.. weather damn shiok

haiyah cannot go out coz e foul weather
so before it started raining. i actually convinced my dad to play badminton with me before i started my revison coz my head was so bogged down with figures since last evening for my POA paper. head was throbbing n i had 2 panadol extra to calm myself down
n i figured well. since i had a bit of time. i can play some sports to calm myself down
theres abt 5000 candidates for exam for the 1st marketing paper. n i got 6 more days
thank god. office has stopped their nonsense calls by now.
HRM.. FW taylor. federick winslow taylor.
kelly twin track model.job redesign
POA. P &L . BS. cashflow. ratio analysis
sociogy, marx , weber. durkheim
its really a lot to digest. n i feel pressured to succumb to lazines & slumber
ok ok serious serious.. essay preparation

battle begins frm 1/5 - 18/5/07

labour day but indeed laborious nite ahead for me and the weeks to come. a lot of focus & effort to make things happen. nt letting anyone to ruin my well deserved break.
enough of socialising now is not the time to play already. if i do not want to risk failing anyunit or waste another more yr of mine.
watched wild hogs. veri enjoyable but have to start long nites at the study table n decline kind dinner offers frm my frens or any form of group date if possible..
coz will get distracted n waste more time on unnessary activites.
i tink have to tabao for most of my meals so as to maximise the hours possible.
hope to c the light after the dark tunnel to c my efforts paid off, fruits of my labour
with all my hectic schedule put in ..
ok adios. have to start revision . serious revision.

genki genki

it seems that i have got over jl coz hes really not the one who i envisage.
in summary hes a rotten scumbag who do not deserve a gem with him
amk hub with of old bean--shopping nlunch with him
bugis-acc him to buy shades frm viv's uncle's shop
starting to get in the mood for exam..begining serious revision
received a surprise sms frm jl to the movies after exam . i reckon by the next time we met up it will be a different type of experience towards him
a purely frienship catch up n nothing more.
2 hrs of reading before i join my family for JB trip. hehehe
giving myself till 1530 to slack till abt 1730
rather a happy n jovial.. happy swinging single.
who i plan to go on short last min trip with my buddies.. getting by each day happier than ever
hahahaahahah
shall decide later if i wanna meet

facial on a sun

finally e house is empty..
did a sleepover @ viv's
her airon was shiok
finally mustered all determination to make a pathetic attempt for the accounting questions
xh's baby is out.. on 15 Apr... my bonus pay day.
clean the fan in my room , swept my room n mopped it.. feeelsclean now..
ok got to wash my face off those mask.. time to start revision

a heavy heart after attending a funeral of someone i know

so attending to a wake after class was something which was naturally quite saddening. e mood was just not right.
every dog has its day. n to tink such a strong person. n a sudden departure
just reminds me to treasure kinship more since life is so fragile
way back when i was 6 or 7 i still used to pop by my ex sister in law's place to overnite or even had reunion dinner with them since we had a rough time when my mum passed away then
its been 13yrs tis yr now since my mother left me..
thinkinh back i was still 11 n now i m 24 capable of taking care of myself on my own n contributing to the family expenses.
to tink tat senior had tots of traveling overseas n before he left . he did the housework n boiled water.. haizz life is like a game sometimes never know what will happen next

long weekend with lots of rest

its been like a 3 day break frm work n was really good
manage to sleep till like 10 or 11 on average
caught a jolin concert. visited my mum's @ mt vernon
another yr has passed.. e kids.. nephew n niece r picking up fast/
kids of the past simply cant be compared to present.
smarter. more fortunate . more access to better environment n facilities
i bet my bro's son has nt sat on a mrt / public transport for more than 5 times since hes borned
bump with my 3rd uncle n his wife n for so many yrs . now we met by chance
its a lot to give in in a family as a role as a mother n wife.. i c tat in my sister in law's role.. as for bro hes got only 2 hrs of sleep n hes got to drive ard to pray to the ancestors @ cck
n hes rewarded with a sudden small fortune as he strike 4d with his intuitive abilities.. hahaha gd for him.
my inital plan of coping on my own seems to b nt tat easy .. i cant really cook well
n i m rather dependent on my siblings rather nt in material but emotional aspect as the value of family dinner n bonding seems strong
after tis week. next week start preparation a bit scared liao

losing n gaining

To sum up 2006, i lost n gain tings which i once had. people n memories which i had.but the fact is its never the same prior to the test of time, the certain beliefs that once clung to me has modified. e inital feeings that was once touched was never the same after a couple of years later. it has got an expiry date for that. & realization struck me.like few buckets of icy water splashed to me straight to my face.
it can never b the same.
losing has made me gained stronger kinship n bond with my family n closer group of buddies.no doubt they have provided me the care that i need during the past 3 months which i had gradually picked myself up frm when i fell. e brief period with that person taught me a few learning pt.some conversation with the consultants has provided the other side of me which needs to be further improved which i will work on strongly to consciously be aware to greatly affect my interpersonal skills with certain external parties ie colleagues , superior n the upcoming ones.letting go of some good memories is never a easy task, but i have faith that i can set my mind to accomplish it.it takes a lot to do that. n to me waking this path till now has never been smooth sailing, frm my innocent adolences to the present.having times of solitude is benefical to b able to sort those confused & mixed messages running in my mind to sieve through the negative emotions & slow emerging to the usual bubbly n chirpy self.
i might have lost someting but i belive i have gained more now.
it will be a more fruitful journey ahead even without some companionship but its ok . coz it needs more of the strength n courage to face it than to hide frm it.
2007 n the upcoming 2008 . as much as i could spice up my activities n do a complete make over but testing my own limit. overiding my personal limitations n enjoying life as it comes.
by taking small steps gradually , i strongly believe it my goals can be achieved ultimately n who knows it might b e best decison made to make up for my loss.
truth stings but it never lies.
cant help but be relieved
that the twist of events can b a blessing in disguise.
0222 250307

a tough day today

a nt so gd start wtih a few diffcult customers 1203
confrontation frm a fellow colleague vs a chao keng colleague, caught in between...well tat was on a mon

tue.. farewell dinner with linda the crew1303
last min claim off,, got a earful frm lee ... n pat.. hehehe
went out on a dinner with CK... friendly person but not my type



wed.. so far so gd1403

Reminiscences

those were the days where we worry about exam, waking up early for sch. studying for finals n working on ur final yr project. i c my niece n nephews looking at their cute school bags brings back to ur school days..

today's trip to causeway pt... gives me much reminiscences of the movie together...

going to the usual shops again is a different type of experience

some tings which r over ought to be , its been almost 3 months since we broke off. i still cant bring myself to forget everyting , e tings shared n done

its like a sore feeling which cant be erased easily n it puts a fear whenever i meet new ppl

i thought i can get over him.

but it takes slower than i tink i could

appointment with e sunlight adviser

hahahahha not another trip to visit the consultant for advice in my overall luck this pig yr..

dunno wats e e outcome after her cousulation

quiet day @ the br...

with e usual interesting characters..

another hr to ko. looking forward to a nice nap

a psychiatric visit with old bean on 23/3

just had lunch with old bean.
called me up .
after visiting the clinic for mc was refered to a medical specialist for his mental health issues
got some info to seek some professional help frm behavioral clinic to seek some form of appointment to find out his source of problem to treat his clinical problems
sleepwalking in the night , nt able to sleep well n occasionally some shocking acts just put an alram,
although its rather worrying..
dunno what is wrong with the issue.
maybe some doctor advice would be good to solve rotten worm's issue n his worries

frm sleeptalking.. gradually smashing the Tv in the rm, to sleep walking n taking a knife ard in the house is certainly rather detrimental..
affects e well being as well as my safety in the house. has to keep a watch or keep my room locked so i can sleep in peace.

got to get more information frm the web to get some facts right so as to to be prepared of the various kinds of treatment to apply .

except for that pt. i guess e family is still right on track,
with me gradually bucking up each day. challenging myself.. reminding myself that i have no more time to waste.. ace thru my upcoming exams.

worm issue can only be solved if he can solve his own problems so he can be no longer a burden to old bean.

no more time to waste..

shiken...

2 more months n it will b exam
feeling e heat man
...
veri soon i have to cross the hurdles n various obstacles to reach my goals n targets
tiring but fufiling lifestyle

tough units.
scared of failure. afraid that i will have to retake , n redo. n my efforts will b wasted
tats a veri dark thought.

after visiting ravee today. she did gave mesome pointers.
like building n improving more PR whic h will aid me in my relationship with people . ie colleagues
its really a challenge, maybe being too straightforward do put me in difficult position
wat brings me after next yr. upon grad is a big question mark like back to the line of cross roads.
lately i been tinking.. really making lots of $$$ n oso achieving the interest which i like to pursue.
is it really a wise decision to leave a comfort zone . n starting frm the scratch
should i go for the swizzerland intership or stay in the comfort n familar banking environement which i have grown so accustomed..
front line indeed is exciting n true enough never boring but can get tiring n mind draining
last nite @ st james was one nite tat i cant forget coz i c the ugly side of human
corroding away in the cells of the nite entertainment
life is never tat peaceful.. each to our own path to seek

study.. read ..regurgitate... in exam n forget

its been stressful living with 2 problemactic men in the house . putting up with all their nonsense, getting some sanity so i wont get mental problems as well

get away with these family soap opera n move out on my own, watever ....it is...tat if e last resort

nt enough of sleep n long hours facing such problems. with e problem child n e senile father.

family issues r always present always a case to give n take until to a pt cannot make it then alternatives to solve e issues

time to retaliate n show my colors n my capabilities of wat i can do. tink i m tat easily bullied.. no way..
its been so unfair, everyone in e family dun seem to care for my pt of view.
i detest n despise men like e rotten one who stays under e same roof as myself. its a challenge to me at my struggling years .
y should such tings happen to me when i should be happily enjoying my prime years.really begining to lose faith n confidence in the next relationship that comes along. its been shitty n theres nothinh to salvage such situation , i wonder if my mum thought tat way when she was my age.
like some tings, i got to face reality n face it alone when e odds come on n crash me on my mental state of mind. reminding me to be stronger n tougher than i imagined i could possibily can b.
some aspects can b fixed like career , self development can b changed if i make effort to
others like a nt so condusive family environment , fucked up loved life cant b helped. continues to b messed up.
like of my fren advised me since it cant b changed, i got to change myself instead. in order to b flexible.
men r nothing. i dun need a man. however i just need one good man .
many characters. types ... e good one doesnt come along easily. n i cant be tat easily swayed just to get out of a troublemaker n risk my future happines for the potential golden years which is approximately like at least 30-40yrs to face n live with tat "someone"
on the other hand, the unhappiness accumulated inside has weathered me till i tink i cant pick n choose like some junk on the street
looking forward to tat person on next weekend on what sort of advice she has installed for me for this pig yr.. in fact i get so affected tat watever i read n study doesnt get in my head. i shouldnt.. but i cant seem to relax

overcoming all odds n hurdles no matter how difficult it takes to achieve

its again another day.. day 3 of CNY
again problem child cannot wake up for work.. use the family car n me , the poor innocent party has to fetch the older lad back..
veri stressed .. have to by hook or by crook complete the UOL program these 2 yrs hopefully next yr due to the following reasons

• Time
• money
• Age
• potential bread winner for the family since pa doesnt have many years to slog already.. puts on a strain on me.. to b able to contribute since rotten worm cant b trusted

testing our patience... well i shall have my strategy on such idiots. since talking sense doesnt help already . i will deal it my own method.. take into consideration my buddy's suggestions

mock exam ...6 days exactly to my 1st paper .. no preparation.

I 've gambling n i lost like $50 during my 3 day intensive gambling session after home visiting..my poor luck probabbly due to i havent pay my fine hahahaha. so its bad luck for gambling

every yr's the same to socialise with those few relatives

talking abt some common topics to catch up

listening to some of the latest gossip frm various uncles n aunties abt their own nuclear family group. each family has their share of issues

overcoming all odds n hurdles no matter how difficult it takes to achieve

i tink when i look back this entry again .. 2 yrs frm now. i would tink tat everyting tat i forgone now is all worth it..

11 days of my bro 3 nt in town, i realized 3 key tings

1. i have been really reliant on my elder bros.. tat i havent been able to b on e road on my own since they r always guiding me n i didnt have the chance to explore so its an eye opener.. after being lost on the road n navigating on my own , as i have poor sense of direction n i m a idiot in reading maps
2. its a skill to fend on my own. whether its on e road or in the society n some tings tat appear to b glamorous like being a proud car owner is nt at all.so many hidden cost to the expenses .. stressed on the safety of your loved ones n careful planning on the road so as nt to miss the way n waste time n petrol
3. i realize e importance of family bonding.. now tat i m approaching my mid twenties soon. tis yr i ate reunion dinner alone beside the tv eating tabao chicken rice frm auntie may . it was so miserable in a way.. started to tink too much whether e family will disperse if pa is nt ard to supervise or pull the family together. e rotten worm continues to give trouble n much worries until his own sad history adds on a precedent of his own broken marriage that i cant afford another disappointment in this family to add on my father 's woes.. selection of the "right " candidate becomes another form of stress to me..someone who can take care of me since i m so used to b taken care of.. till that happens i m on my own to stick on n continue my "struggle" since its a battle with the rotten worm who seems to act stupid is a cunning one in disguise

well ,everyone's learning curve is different. a break is wat i need frm the wrong ppl ... the cert tat i been yearning for the past few yrs is the most important task to complete. it has been a impossible task so far since attempting driving for my 6th attempt i achieved.. n after intensive driving n bumping in the wrong turns . i got e hang of it n i grown to appreciate my family chauffeurs more than ever..

no one can predict tomorrow but i hope to make the best out of today.

always uncertain. many possibilities

200207

1121

march of e pig yr

wow wow. i m suddenly a blooming 24 yr old lass .. how time flies for e past 12 yrs since my previous pig yr at 12, while i was still a kid.
now i have the financial needs to carry myself ard oso to drive myself ard although with much loss of direction.. lousy sense of direction. n it feels scary to be all alone stranded on some dark lane tryiing to fish my way back to my destination..
a nite of roller coaster , while i was so close to my way to fetch my ah pa.. on e eve.. memorable 2007 lunar new yr eve
luckily my ah lu was ard to guide me. was a bundle of wrecked nerves.. after missing my way in the newly estate in sengkang .. hougang..
now i can proudly declare i can strandle with the paths of SLE ,CTE & PIE
yesterday it was a whole day of missing myway n finding my way.
movie , nite rider with my pals n rushing to airport t2 to fetch dad
n it ended with mahjong with my frens...
sleeping at abt 4.. n waking up .. 9 today teary... n i lapse in slumber for a nap of abt 45 mins before setting off to home visiting.
after cny,, will have to focus on studies.. 2 more day to enjoy..

v day 2007

Summary of events on Vday2007

• Fun & Germ's futile efforts to cheer me up on V day by surprising me with a stalk of rose
• Having a celebration with JEssica @ Sakae's PM.. before HRM's lecture
• COuldnt really eat much due to a outburst of a series of events , domestic issues , academic & work
• Attending M's last le cture on the exam format for HRm
• Attending to weird,erratic situation during operations @ work which turns out more problemactic than usual
• Stressful & tiring evening to focus. yawning throughout my class
• Finally retreating 2 slumber n relaxing

do u agree ?

Best Answer - Chosen by Asker
Because reality sets in!Actually its because there are stages to a relationship. The first stage is teh falling in love stage. Then reality sets in, thats stage 2, its where you see your partners flaws. This is the time when most couples split, because you see ther person for who they are not what you think they are when you are in love. Stage 3 is the decision to love stage. It's realizing that your partner is human and then making the decision to love them despite the fact that it feels like you are no longer in love.

wat a so "lucky"day

notice no reads 736700586V
its my first summon since i started driving.. a mere 10min walk to e wet market to get those marketing items leads me to $30 poorer.. shit... 1018am....haizz pay lor
its nt a easy task rememebering routes & finding car park lots ...i seem to have so much trouble finding my way ard .. ..still feels better being the passenger

the operations at work seems to be better now since i have an assistant for me this festive season.

never i have felt so humilatedwhen "he gloated at my presence " when i was doing my work as a front line staff, distributing some new yr sweets . he displays such a childish behavior.
as if depising me on my work.
its none of his business oso..

veri vexed......

so angry...

no choice LL . blame it on my "luck"

begining of a busy work schedule

list of tings on my mind.. sat. sun . mon
no fullrest.. longer working hours to prepare for lunar new yr operation work, event on sun, traiining on mon. nt forgeting mon its e first day of battle ... n 2 weeks of peak human traffic in front line...n finding time to revise on e weekends.. time to pack my room.. spring cleaning.. some time to relax ... sleep n revise for sch work... all tis is so packed....