stand firm in my stand n not be a push over

Both panda n I have plans for the future. Despite many attempts with Bto, we are unable to select house of our own.
His mother is malaysian and suggested that we may choose to stay in the JB house that is now rented out.
Although we have our plans to stay on our own, his mother keep dropping hints to us to stay w her when we settle down.
his mother is widowed therefore i felt that she might feel insecure, but she has 2 other younger son other than so.
During the conversation, So just kept quiet, while i have to keep my stand firm and I politely decline her kind offer. as i felt that JB was not a safe place to stay and in future if kids comes in the picture, it would be really troublesome and also we are not proficient in melayu. it would be a disadvantage for both of us. and if i were to want to go home to sg, it so far away as well. so the lower cost of living is not worth the hassle.
So naturally just want to avoid this topic and puts me in a difficult position as well. As much as i understand the dilenma , i do not wish to be caught up in a situation that i m not happy in my marriage in future becoz of his mum
i know this episode will run n run probabbly 100,000 times since by then his mum should know i m firstly not a pushover, secondly not a dumbass that takes everything for a yes.
yes it is a win-lose situation because ultimately i dun gain coz i know i wont feel happy staying in somebody's property n putting up with her coz in reality the property is not in my name so in future if there is conflict i might not have shelter over my head
secondly if i have conflicts with panda, it would be more difficult to get in touch w my family
thirdly if his whole family gang up against me, i would have to suck thumb and keep quiet because i m nt in my own territory
lastly i wont be a fool to compromise my freedom and privacy for the cost of lower expenses.
i m nt a greedy dumb ass. no free lunch in this world.
n i perfectly know mama boy panda will give in to mother panda time to time.
and if all else really fails i have no choice but to drop the panda before i regret