I was feeling pretty sick and disturbed last night coz I had 4 pills of cbs.. block calories cum tons of medicine for runny nose, fever, flu. dry cough lozenges for sore throat and a capsule for phelgm. M glad out of 5 dAYS. TODAY I M FEELING PRETTY HIGH AND NORMAL.. CAN enjoy the rest of the 4 days of PH. Hari raya and National day.
It was most probably due to the precarious weather which had indeed put me under the weather since Monday. I was whiffing and sneezing like a sick pig and was listless and simply uninterested to indulge in activities like gorging, pigging out. shopping and out in the streets roaming and hanging out. Even having an extra phone call or staying outsides outside more seems to make my head spinning more than ever.
I made Auntie May a Mango Jap cheese cake with the help of Annie Leow and with her generosity to share her skills and patience after a 3hr toil in the kitchen. We managed to get it started and done with. It was the first cake that was ever made in my history and although deco was ugly not in order, the taste was quite light and fluffy, less sweet to suit the taste buds. It was like an initial warmup to prepare a cake for the Panda because of lack of moola and resources. It was something which was intented to create a happy memory for him before we become husband and wife.
Just now when I was in my bed, I kept counting the days left in this house. N it wals 56 days.. thats about 8 weeks to my wedding. I finally sorted out my reason for marrying this man. It was not because of his silly behavior but also his love for my family and my love for his family.The family values we all shared together as a single family syndrome that we are proud to be mummy's boy ad Daddy's girl in this family.
That both our mum and dad sacrificed their lives to put the family together and why my dad placed a lot of importance of family became one of my most important criteria to select a husband as well. It was this trait which was deeply attracted to me.
Besides being greedy and playful together, we both loved our family deeply. And rather than the norm of marrying a daughter off, I would like to think of this matrimonial of extention of love and an additional family to care and share. My Lau Pei officially has an additonal FAT chubby son and my mother in law in 8 weeks time has an extra daughter cum " maid/ helper" to manage the family together.
When I think of this as a different paradigm, the feeling of luginess will diminish a bit.
And the greatest part of giving is not expecting anything in return. Thats like a role of the eldest daughter in law.
As the eldest, now I finally understand stress of being looked upon and learnt with.
It comes with experience, gratitude and grace to be able to love and cherish and acceptance.
Besides the FI papers, I have found the 2nd joy besides serving in customer service.
In order to de-stress as in desserts. I have also got the solution to staying stress free . It is to make more desserts for my loved ones and see a happy smile. This is the part which makes me happy learning how to make happy foods.
And apart from this, my family benefits and it does not really add my waist coz i realise most chefs or those preparing foods or desserts . the joy is not on tasting but seeing other people taste and b most happy about it. Thats the sparkle I like to see for the people around despite the long hours stiring. folding and measuring.
Precision and promptness used to be the least to describe me. I m still as careless and oversee things for work and personal. I m accepting this flaws and overcoming it as I go along.
To adopt a more cautious and slow step before leaping to darker spots as I paddle.
In baking, its all about precision. skills and experience. That goes for chinese cooking, it cannot be learnt overnight and comes with constant practise and feedbacks for improvements.
I m glad that despite me for being so difficult and insensitive, my bosses are still quite patient with me. My colleagues are friendly to give me advice and despite me being spiteful and demanding. They are still being nice to me whenever I need support.
Sifu, my bosses are ever so kind to nego with me on my leave.
Finally the hormones are really making me kinda emo today to think I am left with 8 weeks and become Mrs Wang Eng Pheng with added roles and responsibilities. no doubt this is the new era but me being the new GEN X. I m trying my best to enrol in classes to improve my cooking knowledge and skills.
And as for my close buddies, we may seem meeting lesser but we have not drifted.
It was at my tips that whenever I could, I could spare them some time to bond with. Only Tb now is more unstable with BB ad work career in his direction.
As for me, the faults of product knowledge and work procedures, I am still working hard to aim for accuracy and less hum tam on the exacts work flow.
It was with my best fu fen and I am blessed with who I have and not really what I have now.
I m blessed with a happy family. best pals and wonderful husband and new family to be. This should be a good closing to my wedding speech I just remembered. Oh my. I must have changed difference versions of it.
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