blank in the air. tried to catch a nap but...

溏心风暴 Heart Of Greed indeed a nice drama, watched it , shed a fair bit of my tears for this drama
entangling events. touching scenes abt family, frienship n relationship between different groups of people
on the study table . i placed a new box of tissue
blank in the air. tried to catch a nap since today was such a excruciating hot weather but...the moment i try to close my eyes , the series of events just flashed back to me..
its been abt 13 days .. 13 days without ..
19 days since we last saw each other , 23/5/07
no matter how i try to.. i cannot forget easily
i try to live normally like anyone.. have lunch with my dad.. family dinner.. outing with my friends. go dating with other people
but @ the back . one section of my brain cant seem to functioin back rationally in a part of me
since the "MC" i become stronger in terms of my referral
focus consciously on my grooming to accomodate
went facial to enhance myself
i did everyting to boost my self esteem
i started entertaining my folks like usual after a while, i didnt want to let people who care about me worry about me
be the chatty noisy sam
but i m still nt happy honestly
i m disappointed on some outcomes.
certain setbacks juzt continue to haunt u
i m displeased with the particular male co worker
but i force myself to smile n make peace
i keep all the hidden thoughts to myself n keep n shut all possible photos, memories in order to escalate this phase
i even consider getting my self some medication to help me sleep properly instead of waking up halfway early in the morning n feel sore n tired the next working day
i remember in the heart of greed, there was this scene that his gal xin was so devastated over her ex alfred that she oso kept a blog to blog her thoughts
alfred in the drama commented that when people are sad, they dont drink or smoke
they dun find their friends out
on the contrary. they would feel like writing someting & pen it down
well i tink i m oso doing this , but the only difference is i m using english instead of chinese
so i guess it was rather romantic for them to keep a diary even after 2 yrs of separation
even after alfred met into a fatal accident, xin continued to kept a blog as if her ex was still alive
n e ending was after many many yrs.. xin accepted hai ke yi .. n to express her gratitude , she helped him to win the court case for the family heritance..
e theme song " vincent" was a veri sweet melody using the saxophone
it definitely stirs up some memories